Monday, January 18, 2010

Conan the Barbarian! F#%$ NBC!

Assholes, Conan Obrien, Fuck Them, Fuck You, Jack Parr, Jay Leno, Jonny Carson, NBC, Steve Allen, Tonight Show, you assholes, I hate NBC, you fucked Conan, Shitholes, shitheads, corporate scum, fuckAww hell. I was going to take a week off and do some real work when the Conan Obrien story popped up last week. For those of you, outside the US, you may not give a #`%&, so let me explain. For years the Tonight Show has been an institution on NBC, the National Broadcasting Corporation in the US. After Steve Allen, Jack Parr, Johnny Carson and Jay Leno, the Tonight Show replaced it's nightly host with the spritely and reddenhaired Conan Obrien, a man who had performed the requisite amount of indentured servitude to the network with a late night show at 12:05. And when the time came to reward him, and the American viewers with his own spot following the news, they did. And then fucked him 7 months later. It seems that this time they had saddled the new host of the network's previously unrivaled post news show, with the unsightly experience of getting the old guy, Leno, right before the news?

WTF happened? Ratings took a nose-dive for Tonight. Why? Because, you idiots, you gave the viewers the chocolate they wanted right before the news, and then when the news was over, they simply went to sleep. Local stations around the country revolted. Hold on, said the unhappy husband to his network wife of the moment, "I used to get my BJ at 10:35 but now I get it at 9:35 so I should stay up for what? - Screw that! It's time for a cigarette and I'm history!"

Whaah waahh. Noodle-dick takes over.

And so Conan has spared no expense in sticking it to NBC in his nightly monologue and taking about $40 million with him on his exit. I love it! Screw you? No screw them. He deserves it, if not a bit more. Tiger Woods' wife will probably do better and it's only because Conan didn't shag anybody in the deal. In fact, his network shagged him.

And so goes major media in not understanding psychographics over demographics. I leave you tonight with two stories on the same parallel. 'What's Wrong With Social Networking' and 'What's Wrong With Social Networking'. When the media catches up to the people, that will be the day.

Conan, you Barbarian! Yo! Take the $40 mil and have a wonderful day!
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