"This is absolute madness. Here we are, a country famous for great beer and we're buying this swill? Gimme a f%#*^ng break!" Leterme added. "The stuff's made with rice!"
Leterme failed to get his cabinet -- an unwieldy alliance of Christian Democrats, Liberals, Socialists and nationalist Stella Artois drinkers that took office March 20 -- to agree on a better beer to buy than Budweiser. Vice-premier Didier Reynders urged him to stay on, saying the government must go ahead with its domination of world beers program. Elio di Rupo, leader of the Francophone Socialists, said the lackluster lager reform negotiations were held in a "constructive, positive and extremely fluid climate." But mainstream Flemish parties -- including Leterme's own Christian Democrats -- accused French-speaking parties of not knowing crap about good beer. "Go ahead, name a decent French beer, you morons!", they collectively voiced.
"He's the only American who's got his head screwed on straight", he opined, "America needs to learn to keep it's crap to itself, even if a bunch of numb-nuts from a small European monarchy are dim enough to want to buy it." The Obama camp responded with stock PR release stating the candidate was feeling "retinal fatigue and slightly under the weather" after his strong support for retaining the American brewing powerhouse over the weekend. No comment on Leterme's resignation or VP opportunity was offered.
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